How to Stop Disrespecting Yourself and Start Choosing You

I could write a book on how to stop disrespecting yourself by not keeping the promises you make to yourself. Why? Because I was that person—I’d say I’m going to do something for myself and then flake.

It’s funny how breaking promises to others isn’t something we do often. But when it comes to ourselves, we drop the ball more times than we care to think about. We say we’ll do something, then push it aside. It’s a habit, and one that’s a form of self-disrespect.

We deserve better, and it’s time to change that; lets get into it.

1. Start by Setting Boundaries

One of the first ways to stop disrespecting yourself is by setting clear boundaries. We give so much of our time and energy to everyone else—our families, friends, and jobs. But when was the last time you said no, nope, uh uh, or I won't be able to… to something that drains you, and yes to yourself?

It’s hard, but saying yes to yourself is one of the best forms of self-care. Let go of things that don’t help you grow.

2. Prioritize Self-Care

“I’ll eat better tomorrow.” “I’ll start exercising next week.” Sound familiar? That’s just a quick dopamine hit, friend.

Self-care isn't a luxury… it’s essential. Carve out time every day, even just 15 minutes, for something that feeds your mind, body, or spirit.

Need examples? I got you!

• Read a few pages of a book that inspires you or teaches you something new.
• Journal about how your day went and one thing you’re grateful for.
• Make a cup of tea, sit in silence, and focus on slow, deep breathing.
• Pray, meditate, or talk to God about what’s on your heart.
• Listen to an encouraging podcast or sermon and write down one takeaway.
• Sit outside, feel the fresh air, and just notice what you see and hear.
• Declutter one small area, like a drawer or a shelf, so your space feels lighter.
• Plan tomorrow’s meals or outfits so your mind feels calmer and more prepared.
• Write a loving note to your younger self.
• Review your goals, and rewrite them as “I am” statements to keep your mind focused.
• Do a quick skincare routine slowly and mindfully, paying attention to how it feels.
• Light a candle, turn on soft music, and just sit with your thoughts without your phone.

For accountability, join me in the Project 12 Challenge. It’s been key in holding me accountable.

3. Honor Your Passions

Do you ever dream about doing something you love but never get around to it? Maybe it's painting, journaling, or learning something new. We often ignore our passions because we think other things are more important.

But choosing yourself means making space for joy.

4. Commit to Your Health

It’s easy to push our health aside when life gets busy. But choosing yourself means committing to taking care of your body.

Eating clean, staying active, and using supplements that support your well-being are ways to show love to yourself. In this video on TikTok, I showed my chunky chunky self dancing around and what I look like after a little over 2 months after releasing fat to return to where ever the hell it came from, lol.

I say released because I’m not trying to find that weight again! I’m using 3 simple supplements to make it happen.

1. Meal replacement shakes
2. Vitamins
3. Collagen

You can follow my journey via email if you're interested.

5. Follow Through on Financial Goals

Choosing yourself also means prioritizing your financial wellness. So many of us put off taking control of our finances, but it’s one of the biggest ways to respect ourselves. Whether you’re budgeting, building a side hustle, or just being smarter with your money, it matters.

We tackle financial goals head-on in the challenge, making sure we’re building not just health, but financial security too.

6. Declutter for Peace

A cluttered space can lead to a cluttered mind. Respecting yourself means creating an environment that supports your peace and productivity. Start by decluttering one small area a week.

You’ll feel lighter, more organized, and more in control.

7. Keep the Promises You Make to Yourself

Most importantly, stop breaking the promises you make to you. Small promises build trust with yourself. I’ve learned this through Project 12.

Keeping these small promises is like building momentum. You start realizing how capable you are when you follow through. So, don’t break promises to yourself. You’re worth that effort.

Choosing yourself doesn’t mean neglecting others, but it does mean making yourself a priority. Whether it’s setting boundaries, committing to self-care, or working on your financial independence, these small steps matter.